Focus on Love. When it works, hearts are happy and emotions stable. We feel secure and able to face any life obstacle. Anyone who has experienced a drama filled relationship, been through a divorce or had their heart broken knows how quickly that lack of stability, generally doused with a touch of fear of the unknown can be all consuming.
When love is filled with strife, and tension dominates over harmony, you cannot completely concentrate on anything else because that unique pain is impossible to flee 24/7. You may be able to keep yourself so busy that aloneness with your thoughts is limited, but there is not a true sense of peace and contentment. Physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually we are not designed to live in a constant state of stress and eventually the unresolved issues manifest.
That is why I advocate making emotionally healthy relationships the top priority in 2015, breaking free of drama as the norm in love. If close friends and family members say you do not make wise relationship choices or believe you are not being treated with the honor and respect you deserve, decide to listen this year and take proactive steps toward change.
If you tend to draw high chemistry, intense relationships which consist of highs and lows, breakups and make ups, reevaluation should be your top priority. Stability is not boring and love should not be filled with dramatics.
I strongly believe the number one challenge most people face is learning how to change the course of their negative patterns which manifest not only in romantic relationships, but also in workplace connections, family ties and friendships.
Even if you are dating exclusively, in a committed relationship or married, one can truly live at a higher spiritual and emotional level by truthfully addressing personal challenges which create barriers against effective and honest communication, openness, vulnerability and living with integrity. Making a proactive decision to change what has not worked will lead to a deeper, fulfilling and more meaningful life.
I have coached people at all stages of career success from recent graduates to corporate executives. The common denominator and leveler is the healthiness of their interpersonal relationships.
Material gain and accolades cannot replace the pain of dysfunctional love. Success that survives the moment is never found in career achievement: it is found by establishing personal authenticity and developing strong life convictions. When any relationship is built on a solid foundation of mutual trust and respect, its transparency makes the union emotionally safe.
Regardless of life circumstances, there is a surety of reliability on each other and that confidence by its nature reverberates throughout all other life realms.
I highlight authenticity because the problem many people have is the tendency to hide behind a perfectionist facade to hide self-perceived flaws. When we are not vulnerable and authentic, we’ll attract those who are attracted to the facade.
When you hear of couples saying their spouse dramatically changed after marriage, that probably is very true. Love doesn’t necessary go wrong over finances (which is sited as the number one reason couples divorce) but over the lack of clear communication, the presence of a facade and non-nurturance of the relationship. Lack of authenticity creates a barrier to real communication with the person closest to you as well as those in your intimate circle.
If you want a truly successful year and beyond, I suggest focusing on improving how you engage in your relationships. By making open and clear communication a priority, learning how to effectively and courageously tell the people you love what is on your heart in a manner that can be heard and examining unhealthy relationship patterns, you can be the one in your family line who starts a new, emotionally healthy standard.